Knot just any old massage... 

Across my working life I have had a range of jobs, and they have involved meeting people with varying levels of commitment to their career.   Sometimes people have stuck at their jobs for a long time, and invest the majority of their time getting ahead.  Others constantly change companies as they are always seeking the next step up the career ladder.

Recently though I have encountered another type of being.  A species that is unique in what they do, why they do it and how they do it.  I am talking about the people who work for themselves.

Initially when I went to a network meeting I did as it was an opportunity for ‘self therapy’.   If I had a date when I HAD to leave home, and I HAD to talk to strangers about BuBakes, then I was forcing myself to do something that frankly I really didn’t want to.  

However after a couple of meetings I realized that I came away with a new feeling.  Not one of “oh well done me, I got out for a coffee” but one where I thought “oooh, I can do this!”  I felt inspired, and supported.  Gradually I started having one to ones, and really getting to know a few of the ladies behind their businesses.  

These ladies had businesses ranging from selling products, to offering advice.  From helping with your mind, to helping with your body.  They sold furniture, or hair products.  They sold sweet cones or software.  However no matter how different their businesses were, they all had something amazing in common.  They are all so darn passionate. 

 I don’t mean just passionate about their business, but for everything.  You may think that people who work alone and work long hours are blinkered and focused only on that business, but it’s not true.  These people are passionate about their family, about the holidays they take, about where they buy their coffee, or what they saw at the cinema.  They all seem to have a thirst for life, and an appreciation of how small things can create huge things.

They care for other small business owners, and while there may be an element of “if I help her, she may help me” this is never in a greedy or selfish way.  When these people are together they are like leaf cutter ants; all with their own particular role to play, but also all aware that there is strength in numbers.  They know that by assisting others with their ‘section of leaf’, it means that they may get to share some shelter when needed. 

More of that in another post, for today I’d like to focus on one lady in particular; a lovely lady called Debbie.

Debbie is a holistic beauty therapist.  You may think that you can find a masseuse anywhere these days, you may well be right.  But you know what? You won’t find one like Debbie.   I was very lucky and I won a competition recently for an hours full body massage.  I’d love to take a minute and tell you about what made it so special.

When I arrived at Debbie’s, I felt instantly ay home.  We sat and chatted about how things had been, and as Debbie was aware about my anxiety she was sure to see how it had been affecting me.   

I know that Debbie has experienced her own battles with mental health in the past, and I truly believe that due to this she was able to acknowledge the things that may have been difficult for me, and therefore was able to address them and reduce their impact on my time with her.  

There were a few points that really made a huge difference for me.

1.     The Mind collection pot on Debbie’s desk.  Silly I know, but this always makes me feel at home!  There was no mention of it, so there was certainly no pressure to donate; it was just lovely to see another business supporting the same charity that BuBakes does. 

2.  The sling under my arms.  No more worrying about where to put your arms during a massage.  No more having them bent at the elbows with your hands under your face, only to be told to move them to by your side. 

Debbie had a sling under her couch, so I could rest my arms in front of my face but under the couch.  Perfect, no more dead hands! 

 It also opened up something around my shoulders (Debbie did tell me the proper name, but it escapes me!), which is where my anxiety leaves me very tense and sore.

3.  For the first time EVER when rolling over onto my back mid massage I was told which way to roll.  This may seem silly, but for me when the masseuse lifts the towel and says, “please roll over” I am swept into a panic of “Which way? Will I fall off the bed? Is there one way that will give an eyeful of my boobs? Oh god I still haven’t turned over!” 

There was no need for this!

 4.  The massage itself was great.  It really was.  Just the right level of pressure, varying depending on the state of my muscles.  Also when Debbie did find knots she asked if I could feel them, which was really good as I became aware of what my body was doing.

 5.  Debbie is so passionate about all the benefits of massage, and without being preachy she was very keen to share these with me.  I struggle a lot with guilt about treating myself, however Debbie was able to address this by speaking to me about how aspects of my life and self would be improved.  She was right too, I left her feeling calmer and with a renewed sense of priorities about my work.  I also had a great gym session the next day, and my calves were far more comfortable when I was running after the massage. 

A wonderful thing is that it was all very natural, and because of this I don't think that Debbie realises just how special it is.  I will be honest, to have someone who can preempt some things that stand in the way of me being able to relax, and to naturally acknowledge them, is something very rare.  I could write these things down, but as any anxiety sufferer will tell you; there is a real difference between knowing about it and “getting it”.

So, if you are in the Billericay area and are after a masseuse who genuinely wants to ensure you get the most from your massage, Debbie is your lady. Details can be found here. 

Her passion for what she does is so apparent the second you speak to her.  She is not about you having a massage for the sake of having a massage.  She wants you to fully benefit from the treatment, and I know with me she addressed some of the aspects that could have hindered my enjoyment of the hour, which made a huge difference.

Debbie has kindly offered a £5 discount for any BuBakes reader’s wishng to try one of her treatments for the first time in September and October.  Simply quote BuBakes5 when booking!

As an added note, Debbie has not read this blog post before my publishing it, and I don't gain anything by doing so.  I just feel that she has a real talent for working with people who can experience anxiety around situations such as going for a massage, and I want you all to have the opportunity to experience what I did! 

Enjoy :) 

Bu xx 

BuBakes is committed to reducing the stigma attached to Mental Health, and personally donates 25p for every order received to MIND.  This is kindly matched by three generous supporters, meaning a £1 donation is made per order.  If you would like to find out more about MIND, or make a donation you can do so here.